The Unnamed Protagonist


Novosibirsk, Russia, July 2nd, 2003. I was stuck inside the stomach of a dinosaur. What happened is that I was busy gardening and a giant dinosaur chased after me. I tried flying away but the dinosaur was too fast and gulped me down with one bite. Now I was stuck inside a giant dinosaur’s stomach, with no way out. I had to avoid the stomach acid just so I wouldn’t be digested and killed.

I must think of a plan to get out of here. The dinosaur had been eating buildings from around the world, which means there must be some vector of escape I can find. I looked around the dinosaur’s stomach, atop a skyscraper the dinosaur had eaten. I found a drill shop across the horizon. I could use the drill to drill my way out of the dinosaur’s stomach. But first, I needed to try to burn through the stomach of the dinosaur.

I blasted flames at the stomach lining of the dinosaur, nothing happened except for the lining blackening from the fire. “Damn it!” I thought. Looks like I have to go miles across the dinosaur’s stomach just to grab a drill and escape. I couldn’t fly because I had already tried flying out of the dinosaur’s stomach, wasting my flight energy.

I found an armored bulldozer I could ride. The bulldozer had flamethrowers, guns, and cameras I could see the outside world with. I then entered the bulldozer and started driving.

The inside of the bulldozer wasn’t that technologically advanced. The most technological thing inside of the bulldozer was the monitors used to view what the cameras see. There was a joystick and a button I could control the ride with. The joystick steered the bulldozer, and the button made the bulldozer move forward.

I drove through buildings, breaking the walls and destroying the insides. This ride is extremely cool. I’ve never ridden something so fun before. All of the destruction I could make, without having to use god powers. I then found a carnival, so I decided to ride over there.

At the carnival, there were walking skeletons everywhere. The skeletons were eating concessions, talking, and enjoying the carnival rides. I saw a game I liked and went over to go play it. The game I liked was a dunk tank game.

At the dunk tank, there was a short line. My turn came shortly after I went into line. I threw my tennis ball and hit the target square in the center. The skeleton on the chair fell into the water. But all of a sudden, the dinosaur’s stomach started to flood with water.

I swam through the water as jelly donuts were floating to the surface of the water. I tried avoiding the jelly donuts, but they stung me repeatedly with their jelly oozing out on me. Eventually, the water stopped flooding and I was back at ground level. “What an odd experience” I thought. The water was strange, as it never came in through the top of the stomach. My best guess was that the water came from the intestines, or the dunk tank triggered the flood.

The carnival was ruined. The tents were soggy, and the rides were now malfunctioning because of the water damage to the electrical components. All of the food was destroyed by the water too. The skeletons were upset at the flood, they all started swearing and throwing their fists up in a fit of rage. I tried to calm the skeletons down, but they wouldn’t. Then, a metal gorilla came falling to the ground. The gorilla was made almost entirely of metal, and it had wrecking balls for fists. The gorilla then came and attacked me.

I nearly got hit by the metal gorilla. The metal gorilla kept punching at me, but I dodged all of the attacks. Then, the gorilla clapped its wrecking ball hands, sending shockwaves that penetrated my ears. All I could hear was ringing and I was dazed. I luckily got back to being aware right before the metal gorilla jumped on me to kill me. I looked to my side and found a tank.

I ran over to the tank, hopping inside. The gorilla was confused as to where I went so it walked away from the scene. I then followed the gorilla with my tank, putting it in my gun crosshairs. I fired the gun, and the metal gorilla blew up into a bunch of shrapnel. I was luckily in an armored vehicle so the shrapnel wouldn’t hit me.

At this point, my flight energy had recovered. So, I flew over to the drill store where I bought a drill to escape with. I took one of the biggest drills the store had and drilled a hole right through the stomach of the dinosaur. Eventually, I had burrowed through the dinosaur entirely and was back in the outside world again.

Published Dec. 26th, 2021